A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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