If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
