does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
