He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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