Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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