Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
