More tranny stories later!
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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