I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize