This is not my ceiling
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
