My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
her vagine was all disorganized.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
