giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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