i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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