im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
