Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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