With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
