I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
