There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He? As in you personified your dick?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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