I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
