Umm I'm too high to move.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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