Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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