trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
