Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
