You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
No subtext here. People are naked.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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