I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
