I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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