Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
How external is "for external use only"?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize