very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
