the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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