And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
