So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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