when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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