You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
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