I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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