i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Come share oat with me in your robe
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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