So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
