I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
She told me I should be a condom model.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Randomize
