If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
