does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize