Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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