It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
