Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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