Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. đź’€
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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