Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
that is very illegal...i love you.
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