Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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