sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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