I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize