I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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