Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
