is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
