i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
