I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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