Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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