I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
